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He Who Laughs Last, Lasts by Harriet Morgan (Apr 2009)
“When I win this million dollar prize from the magazine company, I’m
going to leave you and live the rest of my life in luxury, Harry!”
“Well, then, Lillian, I guess I’m stuck with you. Your chances of
winning that million dollars are almost nil! ” Harry turned back to the
television program he had been intently watching before his wife made her
nightly statement. Lillian shrugged before continuing to
fill out her latest entry to the million dollar contest. This was the same discussion the
couple had had every evening for the past 10 years. In fact, it was just about
the only discussion they ever had.
When I win that money, he’ll be sorry. I’ll be out of here
so fast it’ll make his head spin. I’m going to hire a top notch attorney and
get a quick divorce. I’ll have a snazzy apartment with nice new furniture and
a cute, sporty little car - all those things Harry’s never been able to
afford.
Remembering a recent
conversation with their oldest child, Lillian winced a little. Jason had asked,
“Mom, why do you and Dad argue all the time? You must have had 20 good years
together before you started this incessant quarreling. I feel like I need to put
both of you in timeout, like I do my kids when they fight.”
“Jason, you just don’t
know how difficult your dad can be! He has so many irritating habits: the way he
clears his throat all the time and he never listens to me. When he’s home
he’s always glued to that TV! ”
“I know, Mom. Dad says
just about the same things about you.”
“I don’t watch that much
TV and I certainly don’t clear my throat all the time.”
“Well Dad‘s complaints
are slightly different, but it‘s really the same thing. He says you nag him
all the time and are always working those ‘confounded’ (his word) crossword
puzzles and talking about winning the million dollar drawing. You know that Dad
clears his throat often because of his allergies. He can’t help it, Mom. Is
that really enough to cause a marriage of 30 years to end?”
“Yes, it is, son.” Yes
it is! Besides it’s 32 years, but who’s counting? **********
One morning a few weeks
later, Lillian sat at her kitchen table filling out her latest entry for the
million dollar drawing. Because she had missed her home mail pickup that day and
the contest deadline was quickly approaching, she gathered up her mail and
headed to the local post office. The weather had been so beautiful lately that
the middle aged woman decided to walk. After all, it’s only a few blocks
and heaven only knows I can use the exercise! Maybe I’ll do this every day and
see if I can lose some of these extra pounds. Great idea!
As she walked along enjoying
the warm, early spring sun, her walk became a stroll. She listened to the birds
singing and stopped from time to time to admire some of her neighbors’
beautifully groomed yards; freshly turned soil where vegetable gardens were
being planted; and the daffodils and tulips that were beginning to open up.
When a voice from the past
called out, “Hi, Lillian!”, she happily stopped to visit with Judy Woods, a
former neighbor with whom she had made trips to the park when their children
were little. Judy invited her in the house for a cup of tea and a nice visit.
“Oh, my gosh, Judy. This has been
wonderful, but it’s getting late and I need to get to the post office before
it closes. We’ll have to get together again soon.”
As her friend rushed off,
Judy replied with a smile, “You bet, Lillian.” Lillian looked at her watch as she
continued on toward the post office. There, made it with ten minutes to
spare! What a great day! Beautiful weather, a nice visit with an old friend, and
my entry mailed in time for the big contest.
Oh, how I would love to win that million
dollars! I’m so tired of Harry’s irritating habits. I could take walks like
this and go out with friends whenever I wanted if had that money.
She was so wrapped up in her
day dreams of wealth that, at first, Lillian failed to notice the rain clouds
beginning to gather. As she rounded the corner a couple of blocks from home, the
clouds suddenly opened and poured rain as only a spring shower in Oklahoma can
do.
Oh, dear, I better hurry up or I’m going to
be soaked!
Lillian lifted the hood over her head and pulled her
jacket tightly around her shoulders as she began to run for home. When she got
to the corner, she was so involved in trying to keep dry and get home, she
neglected to “look both ways”. She never saw the car that hit her. **********
“Dad will you be okay now.
I really need to get home to Susan and the kids.”
“I’ll be fine, Jason.
Thanks for your help. I wouldn’t have been able to do all the necessary things
for your mom’s funeral without your help.”
Just about that time
Harry’s doorbell rang out. “Let me see who this is before you go, son.” It
took a few minutes for Harry to take in all the commotion at his front door.
Standing in a half circle facing the door were several people Harry had never
seen before. One held a bunch of balloons. Another cradled a huge bouquet of red
roses. All were wearing big smiles and chanting “Congratulations, Lillian!”
The smiles faded slightly as this group of celebrants began one by one to
realize that this was not Lillian. Finally, a dignified older man, holding an
oversized check with many zeros on it, stepped around the others and spoke to
Harry. “We are here to award our one million dollar prize to Mrs. Lillian
Jackson. Is she home?”
After clearing his throat
several times and shaking his head to clear the fogginess he was experiencing,
Harry croaked, “No. My wife, Lillian, died in a car accident earlier this
week. We just returned from the cemetery.”
“Oh, my! I’m so
sorry.” The spokesman said. He turned to face the rest of the crowd, and
raised his arms and then slowly lowered them, as though directing a choir to be
seated. There was an immediate hush.
“Mr. Jackson, I know this
won’t replace your loss, but as your wife’s beneficiary, you are entitled to
receive this prize. I hope that somehow this check for one million dollars will
help alleviate your pain. He handed Harry the check before he and the other
members of his entourage turned slowly and silently and returned to their
limousine and drove away. Harry watched them drive away, then turned around to reenter his home. A large grin began to spread over his face as he muttered, “Yes, it will help |
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